Monthly Archives: April 2011

Prof. Brian Cox’s testicles account for 77% of matter in the observable Universe, a leading scientist claims

STARTLING claims that the scrotum of Brian Cox, keyboard player for Labour’s house band D:Ream and part-time astrologer, contains the vast majority of matter in the observable Universe, have rocked the world of synthpop and experimental physics.

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Handrail hardon

What with it being the holiest time of year I feel like I should make a confession, especially as it’s nearly Easter and I’ve given up being an atheist for Lent. Forgive me Flangers for I have sinned. I’ve been neglecting you. … Continue reading

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A bit of me time

Some steaming hot mumuendo that is literally moments old. My mum has just bought a Fiskars Weed Puller for pulling up dandelions. I was trying it out for the first time to weed my lawn and she said:

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Mother’s delay

This post is slightly out of date, mainly as I forgot I’d taken the picture, but worth sharing nonetheless. Every year the guy who runs the ‘fruit n’ veg’ stall near my office makes signs to promote Mother’s Day. Now, … Continue reading

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Trouser snake

It’s been a while since I updated MoB and I’ve been getting complaints, which is a compliment I suppose. But I need to point out that my life, despite appearances and my constant frowning, is not made up of wall … Continue reading

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What a shithole!

Because my family and I have a childish sense of humour we love nothing more than changing the names of tube or train stations to something inappropriate and pejorative to the area – classics such as Anus Groove (Arnos Grove), Shatfield (Hatfield) and Bell-end Hard-on Shitty (Welwyn … Continue reading

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Roomy restaurant

Another picture update for you today, you whingeing ingrates – I love you all really! Not strictly speaking a Spotted Dick but worth including me thinks. The picture doesn’t need explaining, it really does speak for itself. But one question for … Continue reading

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